If you have to cry…go to the bathroom

February 10, 2010 at 5:46 PM | Posted in I support this, Seriously? | 6 Comments

“If you have to cry,  go outside” – Kell on Earth

Kelly Cutrone. Thank you. Can you embroider this on a pillow, attach to the back of plane, splash it on a billboard in Times Square and tattoo it on my forehead?

I can empathize with this largely because I absolutely HATE seeing people cry. Hate hate loathe abhor hate! I’m not insensitive and I am very in touch with my “feelings” but like Kelly said “go outside,” my advice is to “go somewhere” if you feel you’re going to cry in a public setting. ESPECIALLY at work. That is HA-UGE NO-NO. Your place of employment is not the stage for waterworks, or a pity party. Besides being unprofessional it is downright uncomfortable for those around you. Mainly people like me.  People who will look at you like you have 98,496 heads if you start with that nonsense.

What am I supposed to say to Tammy/Tommy Tears? Pat ’em on the back? Hand ’em a tissue? Give ’em a hug? None of these options appeal to me. Why am treating a grown-up like a child? Not to mention, crying  is for sissies counterproductive in the workplace. I think it’s absolutely fine to ball your eyes til they fall out of your face in privacy. In public? C’mon dude, no one wants to see that.  I especially hate when a woman cries in the workplace. As women we are already stereotyped as the more emotionally volatile, weaker sex, why perpetuate the garbage? At the same token, I hate seeing a man cry.  So, to be fair I’m an equal opportunity cry-ist.

Maybe my anti-tear stance came from years of being sent to the bathroom whenever I felt the need to burst into tears. Before the whine even escaped my lips I was banished to the bathroom to comfort myself. Because crying in the bathroom is lame to even a 4 year old, my tantrums were short lived and I re-appeared with a more acceptable temperment.

Crying should be the last option you resort to and at most a short prelude to a course of action. Sort through the problem and resolve it. Crying doesn’t make anything disappear except your make-up and your cool. Then you’ll be known as that guy/girl that cries. Crying is a relief but just the same as relieving oneself, do you do that in front of everybody?

Am I being too harsh? Should public tears be excused? Speak on it.



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  3. […] fun! Now what’s more attractive than fun? Yep you got no counter-point. I’ve explained my repugnance for public crying. Laughter is the direct opposite of repugnance. I’m sure, most can agree the sound of […]

  4. Kelly Cutrone, love her advice.
    She’s not cold, she’s real.

  5. […] Related: If you have to cry…go to the bathroom […]

  6. You are not being harsh at all. I watched a grown man cry at a staff meeting because he got emotional about the students he was working with. I love my kids as much as anyone else but I wanted to burst out laughing. You just don’t do that in front of your boss and coworkers. I totally wanted to tell him to stop it. Am I harsh?

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